Kid Free as a Single Mum

I’m kid free for a day and night.

What do I get up to as a single mum?

You would think it’s rest. Freedom. Silence.

But for me, it feels like a 24-hour countdown.

A countdown that starts with stress.

What is my top priority now?

Do I socialize with my friends and hold an uninterrupted adult conversation?

Not always.

The kids have dragged toys through the house.

I’m behind on the washing, the dishes, the dog poo, the vacuuming, cleaning out my car of old kid snacks.

My mind doesn’t switch off just because they’re not here.

I have been on auto pilot all week.

So, maybe I should take the dog for a walk – for my mental, emotional and physical health.

But then-

I have financial stress. I need to use this time to plan my next move. To figure out how to create more stability for my family.

But then-

I need to read. To learn. To rest.

To calm my nervous system before the kids come back.

And then-

I’m thinking about the week ahead.

The before and after school meltdowns.

How can I create better routines.

How can I help us all regulate emotionally.

Maybe I need to get outside. To let go of the stress from the past week.

This is what a woman’s mind can look like when she is finally alone.

Not resting – still working.

A short window of time trying to figure out how to be everything at once.

To be productive.

To learn how to be present.

To try and heal.

And to be prepared for their return.

24 hours to find balance.

And I am a woman who often feels out of balance.

If I fall behind on the household chores. It sits with me.

But I am finding that balance isn’t always external.

Sometimes, it’s internal.

A single mum doesn’t just need time off.

She needs space.

Space to sit in her thoughts.

To feel her emotions.

To plan.

To organise.

To come back to herself.

So now-

I give myself an hour or 2 to reset what I can.

And then I choose.

I write for my blog.

I work on my business plan.

Or I nourish my soul.

Whether that is connection, a walk in nature walk or doing something creative.

Because being kid free isn’t about being free to relax.

It isn’t about doing it all. Playing catch up.

It’s about having space to plant seeds - and watering them.

It’s about remembering that I exist too.